“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them” (Colossians 3:18-19).
Paul’s instructions are in keeping with his teaching in Ephesians 5, highlighting the importance of submission on the part of the wife, and love on the part of the husband (cf. Ephesians 5:22,25).
The difference in instructions is not because of any inequality, either perceived or actual. In fact, Paul establishes the equal worth of all humans in Galatians 3:28, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”
The difference in instructions comes because of the position of each in the marriage relationship. To illustrate, consider that an employer has a different position, (and therefore authority), in a company than his employees. As such his responsibilities and actions are influenced by his position. This does not mean that he has more human value. Remember our founding fathers’ words, “All men are created equal.”
The wife is to submit because God gave the headship in the home to the husband (cf. Ephesians 5:23). The husband is to love the wife (seek her welfare) because to exercise authority without that limitation leads to despotism. Consider how destructively a man might wield his authority in the home if he harbors bitterness in his heart toward his wife.
As always, God’s way brings harmony and blessings.
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