Category: Friendship

In Paul’s personal letter to Philemon, he referenced his brother in a very favorable light. Let’s look at some of the words he used.

In verse 1 he called Philemon a “beloved friend and fellow laborer.” He noted the faithfulness of Philemon as a child of God in verses 5 and 6, and let Philemon know he prayed for him continually (4). He talked of the great joy and consolation he received from Philemon’s love (7), and noted his positive influence toward other Christians (7).

As he made his request to Philemon on Onesimus’ behalf, his positive expressions continued. He said he had “confidence” saying that he knew “you will do even more than I say” (21).

From these words we can see that Philemon was a righteous and good man, who was quick to express love to his brethren. While Onesimus had wronged him by running away, Paul was confident because he knew Philemon’s character that Philemon would receive him back with love rather than censure.

It also says something about Paul. He was not a flatterer, he was an encourager who was always willing to show what God desires His children to be. May we emulate the love these men had for each other in our relationships.

Each of these articles in past weeks have emphasized our responsibility to help each other. At this point we recognize the importance of expressing love for our neighbor, and the emphasis that the Lord places on our good treatment of other brethren. The imperative of love is what divides the righteous from the unrighteous.  The Lord emphasized this truth, distinguishing between two groups as He talked of future judgment. His statement, “Come, you blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the beginning of the world” (Matthew 25:34), was directed at those who were benevolent and loving to others. A peculiar part of our culture is the pride (or perhaps other motivations) that cause some to refuse the help or friendship of others. This should never be the case with a Christian. Why would we ever put an obstacle in the way of another’s potential reward in Judgment?

Hopefully we will be quick to offer friendship, care, benevolence and hospitality to those we love. We should be quick to ask, “What can I do?” And to “rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15). Consider the very next verse of that context, where Paul admonishes the Romans, “Be of the same mind toward one another…” (16). If we are ready to help our brothers, but unwilling to ask for or receive the same from them, how can we be described as being of the same mind? Part of being gracious is our willing reception of the help offered by our brothers and sisters in Christ. We should not let pride, or a desire “not to be burden” to impede their efforts to do what God expects of all of us. Continue reading “(13 of 13) My Individual Responsibility to Accept Your Friendship” →

All of us understand the importance of friendship. We grasp it when we are young. Perhaps that is why a little child can come tell their parent after an hour’s play, “Mommy, I have a new friend!” This desire and readiness to accept another as a friend, unfortunately, becomes more rare as we get older. Personalities, politics, religion, culture, and biases all begin to erect boundaries. Perhaps personal disappointment or unpleasant experiences make us more cautious and make it harder to foster close relationships.

Disappointed experiences change nothing about the benefit of friendship. We are told, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Proverbs 27:6). All of us need a voice we can trust and cherish, knowing that what they say may be difficult to hear, but it is said out of love and concern for us. A voice that comes from someone who we know is looking out for our interests.  In short, a friend. Continue reading “(5 of 13) The Warmth of Friendship” →

As Christians we are part of God’s family. God is the Father (Matthew 23:9), Christ is the elder brother (Romans 8:29; Hebrews 2:11), and we have our relationship with them through adoption (Romans 8:15; Ephesians 1:3-6). The importance of this spiritual family with God as its Head can’t be overemphasized. It is because of it that we have the hope of eternity. Our hope is through adoption, as through it we become heirs, “that we may be also glorified together” (Romans 8:17).

Since matters of eternity trump temporal ones, it is right to say that our spiritual family is more important than our physical one. This is not to minimize our physical family and relationships. Jesus Himself is a wonderful example in this. He dearly loved his mother. One of his last acts before his death was to instruct His disciple John to care for her after His death (cf. John 19:26-27). However during His ministry Jesus showed His spiritual priorities as His physical family came to see Him and speak with Him. One of His disciples told Him, “Look, Your mother and Your brothers are standing outside, seeking to speak with You.”  Jesus’ answer was one that every Christian should consider carefully. “But He answered and said to the one who told Him, ‘Who is My mother and who are My brothers?’ And He stretched out His hand toward His disciples and said, ‘Here are My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father in heaven is My brother and sister and mother’” (Matthew 12:48-50). Continue reading “(2 of 13) Knowing Your Brothers and Sisters” →

A discussion of Ecclesiastes 4 that shows the vanity of a life lived without the benefit of friends and family. Jesus is the Christian’s ultimate friend!

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In 2 Chronicles 20:31-37 we have a short chronicle of the reign of Jehoshaphat in Judah. There are a few interesting tidbits we can glean from the account.  First, while there are things that Jehoshaphat failed to do “the high places were not taken away” (33), in all Jehoshaphat did “what was right in the sight of the Lord” (32). This was a continuation of the good that his father Asa accomplished in his 45 years reigning on the throne (16:13), and greatly contrasted with the idolatrous conditions in Israel, under kings Baasha, Ahab (related to Jehoshaphat by marriage), and Ahaziah, who all “acted very wickedly” (20:35).

Despite all of the good that Jehoshaphat did in his reign, he was punished by God because of the company he kept late in life. We are told that he allied himself with wicked king Ahaziah of Israel, “to make ships to go to Tarshish” (20:36). This economic choice to ally with the wicked king brought a prophecy against him. “But Eliezer the son of Dodavah of Mareshah prophesied against Jehoshaphat, saying, ‘Because you have allied yourself with Ahaziah, the Lord has destroyed your works.’ Then the ships were wrecked, so that they were not able to go to Tarshish” (20:37). Continue reading “Who Are Your Friends?” →

The book of Proverbs has many pithy gems of wisdom, including this one, found in 27:6, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” These words well illustrate the concept of love that should be the foundation of our interactions with one another.

Jesus words, “Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 7:12), are the basis of this bit of wisdom.

A friend will seek your welfare, even if it requires him to correct you.  An admonition or criticism, if needed, will still hurt (wound). But, as it comes from a friend the intent is recognized, and the wound can bring change and improvement.  So, the wounds of a friend are “faithful.”

Interestingly, one of the most effective tools that Satan and his minions have is flattery. Any praise of our intelligence, our accomplishments, our attractiveness can be used to manipulate and deceive.  We are all vulnerable to these tactics. It is best to be on guard!

Jude talked about false teachers in this way.  “These are grumblers, complainers, walking according to their own lusts; and they mouth great swelling words, flattering people to gain advantage” (Jude 16). The apostles warned of this type, and Jude notes, “These are sensual persons, who cause divisions, not having the Spirit” (19).

When receiving criticism OR flattery, the wise man’s words are worthy of consideration.

We live in cynical times. The dishonesty and fickleness of the world makes it difficult for us to trust our fellow man. We see everywhere politicians breaking campaign promises, marital infidelities and corrupt businesses acting in unethical ways. Each of us from time to time may have experienced betrayal even from family and friends. Perhaps we even have been guilty of failing others in this regard.

However, there are many faithful Christians that we can trust. They love God, and love us, and we can be confident that they are always looking out for what is best for us. It is a wonderful thing to find a faithful brother or sister, especially if we take advantage of their goodness by letting ourselves trust them.

Paul wrote to the Corinthians, “Open your hearts to us. We have wronged no one, we have cheated no one. I do not say this to condemn; for I have said before that you are in our hearts, to died together and to live together” (2 Corinthians 7:2-3).

There is no doubt that Paul was true to his word. He was a wonderful man, who even while admonishing the Corinthian Christians, only wanted what was best for them. If they opened their hearts to Paul, they could be sure he would do anything to help them, even to die for them.

You know Christians like that! Open your hearts to them! And look at your own heart, are you such a person?

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Speaker: Tommy Davis

This lesson discusses the importance of having righteous friends with their good influences, and the danger of evil companionship.

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“Wealth makes many friends, but the poor is separated from his friend” (Proverbs 19:4).

It is an unfortunate reality in life that wealth brings popularity. Not that someone might actually become wealthy, but that it can bring out inappropriate reactions from others. For example, the newly rich has a difficult time knowing who is a friend because of genuine affection, and who is a “friend” because they hope to benefit from the wealth, influence or opportunities of the friendship.

The same thing is true with the poor man, whether newly minted or habitually bereft. He has no money, no influence, no opportunity to help anyone who wants to graft onto his friendship. So, he has a hard time making friends.

Wealth has nothing to do either with character or success as defined by God. It does not make a man more spiritual, and it can actually bring challenges to faith. Remember the Lord’s words in Galatians 3:28, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Add to it, “there is neither poor or rich”, and you get the idea.

So, as Christians, we should be “wealth blind.” Our relationships should be based entirely upon genuine affection, not upon a hope for personal gain. (Read James 2:1-9).

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Principles such as love, trustworthiness, empathy and honesty are discussed as we seek as Christians to deepen our friendships with one another.

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Sermon by Bob Ward.

The lesson is a scriptural discussion of the topic of friendship.

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Good Christians make good friends. This is because the basis of good friendship is love, which is the same basis of the Christian walk. The sermon examines Faith and friendship, to show how using Scriptural principles will help us to become better friends.

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