As a preacher, I have interacted with many individuals about their desire (or lack thereof) to receive help in time of need. Whether it be financial, regarding health, or mundane things like a ride to the airport. I have seen many different attitudes over the years. The extremes range from an unwillingness to accept any help to a willingness to impose upon others for things one could do for themselves. I must say that while there is obviously a spectrum which we all are on, the extremes bother me. I think they are both sinful.
First, note the entitled. We actually have fostered this attitude in our modern society. Half of the annual Federal budget is made up of what are termed “Entitlement Programs.” While such a safety net is a sign of a government that cares for its citizens, there is no doubt that many in the past and present have abused these programs. What was intended as a help to the needy has become a way for some to get by without any personal effort. The Bible certainly does not approve of such an attitude. Paul wrote, “For you yourselves know how you ought to follow us, for we were not disorderly among you; nor did we eat anyone’s bread free of charge, but worked with labor and toil night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, not because we do not have authority, but to make ourselves an example of how you should follow us. For even when we were with you, we commanded you this: If anyone will not work, neither shall he eat” (2 Thessalonians 3:7-10).
I think this is more typical of the worldly. Those who are not constrained by the expectations of God. What is much more prevalent among children of God is the desire not to take advantage of the love and generosity of their brethren. I come across it often, and there have been times where it has impacted the spiritual welfare of the one in need. In contrast to the government, God has created in the church a true family! A group of like minded brethren whose love for one another makes them ready to help anyone who truly is needy. They do this willingly, even eagerly. And it is a beautiful thing to see.
The Bible is replete with such examples. It might be the personal compassion of our Lord who fed thousands, went about Galilee healing and casting out demons, and expressing love and compassion to His disciples and friends. In his final moments on earth, while hanging on a cross, He ensured the welfare of His mother. “When Jesus therefore saw His mother, and the disciple whom He loved standing by, He said to His mother, ‘Woman, behold your son!’ Then He said to the disciple, ‘Behold your mother!’ And from that hour that disciple took her to his own home” (John 19:26-27).
The early church helped widows and indigent saints. The churches of Macedonia were singled out for praise by the Apostle Paul, “For I bear witness that according to their ability, yes, and beyond their ability, they were freely willing, imploring us with much urgency that we would receive the gift and the fellowship of the ministering to the saints” (2 Corinthians 8:3-4).
Individual Christians heeded the call of benevolence in response to Jesus’s teaching (the good Samaritan, Luke 10:37); and the admonition of the Holy Spirit, “Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world” (James 1:27). Our Lord expects us to be freely willing and eager to demonstrate our love for the brethren and the world at large by a willingness to help others in their time of distress and need.
And yet some among us refuse help (even while we are willing to offer it to others), even when we have a legitimate need that our brethren could supply. It is especially egregious and wrongminded when that refusal causes personal harm to us spiritually. Things like missing worship because we refuse to allow others to supply a ride. Not letting our brethren know of prayer needs because we don’t want to burden others. Allowing ourselves to become isolated from our spiritual family because “I don’t want to be a bother.”
Though Paul wrote about personal responsibility, and exercised self-sufficiency whenever possible, he also expressed on many occasions his desire for his brethren to help him! One special example of this is found in Romans 15:30-33, “Now I beg you, brethren, through the Lord Jesus Christ, and through the love of the Spirit, that you strive together with me in prayers to God for me, that I may be delivered from those in Judea who do not believe, and that my service for Jerusalem may be acceptable to the saints, that I may come to you with joy by the will of God, and may be refreshed together with you. Now the God of peace be with you all. Amen.”
Paul knew that receiving help from other Christians was good for him, but better for the helper! I love his response to the benevolent help sent to him while in prison by the Philippians. He wrote, “Now you Philippians know also that in the beginning of the gospel, when I departed from Macedonia, no church shared with me concerning giving and receiving but you only. For even in Thessalonica you sent aid once and again for my necessities. Not that I seek the gift, but I seek the fruit that abounds to your account” (Philippians 4:15-17).
We are to help others by allowing them to help us. They desire to please God by helping you when hurting. Don’t let a concern about being a bother get in the way of God!
